Wednesday, February 20, 2008

The Mysterious Disappearance of the Lying Hero


Last summer, like all summers before them, I was bombarded with tales of high mileage, pro-caliber average speeds, and a rare and profound love for cycling. Individuals and groups each wove a tapestry of intricate stories detailing heroic conquests aboard their trusty steeds. Racers were dropped, obscene wattages were produced, and punishment was meted out with unchecked brutality. Blow by blow accounts of hard fought city limit sprints were recalled in language analogous to historic battles like Antietam and Stalingrad.

Their supreme dedication and pathological affinity for letting everyone in on their awesomeness elevated our great sport to inspiring heights. I was jealous of their kids. Who wouldn't want such gallantry in their genes? These wondrous warriors of cycling chic. Martyrs who would carry our sport to such places that Coppi, Anquetil, and Merckx (if only they knew their names) never dared. We should dream easily knowing these guardians were manning the gate of our beloved sport. If only they were still here.

The shop has sat eerily silent the past few months, save for the quiet, time worn echoes of the old guard stirring. The once vibrant, promise-filled exuberance of warmer, sun drenched days are gone. Cycling's newest heroes have, predictably, been vanquished. Victims of loving the myth more than the ride.

9 comments:

Ari said...

Soon enough they will be in again and the Bull shit story will begin again. I am ready for them!
Ari

PointsRacer said...

Holy $hit. Where do you find these pictures!!!!

Ari said...

Strangelife has a secret search engine that Bill Gates would pay millions of dollars for. Unfortunate for Bill, Strangelife's blog is more important to him than mOney.
ari

PointsRacer said...

1 more thing.

Sadame-san is the coolest looking lady. You have a great family.

Strangelife said...

pointsracer: elven artists with a keen interest in the sport we love. all 3 1/2 feet of sadame-san is very cool.

ari: bill don't even know...

The King said...

I have been training at 400-600 watts all winter long averaging 26+ mph on the trainer. Gearing up for tall tales.

strangelife said...

That's the King I adore- slayer of dragons with a wooden sword. Surely all men yield to thee.

s.

ps. welcome back

Ari said...

The King has been waxing his Chamois!!
Superslide baby,
Ari

K-Ro said...

Great post.