God Save the Retards

"I'm surrounded by assholes." - Dark Helmet, Spaceballs

For all the chest thumping and hard attitudes, the U.S. is looking more and more like a country made up of a shitload of blameless, stupid, pussies. Look no further than New Jersey for the latest in weak-kneed prissiness.

"The New Jersey bicycle business may be in serious trouble unless retailers and suppliers take immediate action. State legislators earlier this week approved a bill banning the sale of all bikes equipped with current quick release wheels and tabbed tips."

Can they possibly make the quick release simpler? How do these mongoloids survive each day without walking into open manhole covers or drowning in the soup du jour at the local Olive Garden? Should bike shops start welding the fucking axles to the dropouts now?

They always wrap this type of shit in some kind of "save the children" mantra. How about saving them from dipshit parents that teach them to deflect any form of responsibility with a finger pointing at someone else and an assload of excuses?

The idiocy is profound.

Thanks to Drunkcyclist for the nugget.